Malcolm, a broke, geekish student of Maths & Philosophy, is plagued and fascinated by ambiguity. He loves girls but loathes sixties pop culture. Trouble is the girls seem to inhabit only the trendiest, noisiest venues. Alone, he winces, cringes and lusts his way though a world of megalomaniac DJs and trendy boutiques, and daily he battles canteen staff over the definition of a sandwich. We follow his ups and downs from Tyrolean pistes to the dusty summits of bookcases in the vast college library, where he lodges to avoid rock 'n' roll, and rent. Will he ever find peace, love, and catering clarity?